Wednesday, April 06, 2005
Bored To Death Of Death

A request to famous people: stop fucking dying. Give us a two-week moratorium on celebrity death; you're bringing us all down. And yeah, that goes for Mitch Hedberg too -- especially him, he had no business going and dying when he was just getting good. And for future reference: the deaths of persons over the age of 80, or who've been ill for more than ten years, shouldn't be a surprise to anyone. Old guys die -- what, you didn't see it coming? Nobody even noticed Saul Bellow's death, and I'd wager he did more for the good of mankind than Prince Ranier ever did. (Seriously, what did he ever do for us? Unleashed Princess Stephanie on an unsuspecting world? Phphpht, please... like we needed another Stephanie going around acting like a Princess.)

As the WWII generation reaches antiquity and the Boomers move into the early phases of the Great Boomer Die-In, dead famous people are going to become more and more common. We can't be having week-long retrospectives every time a Mick Jagger or a Jack Nicholson karks it (at least one of which is virtually guaranteed within the next ten years); there isn't enough time in the programming day. Maybe we could segregate it all on some kind of all-celebrity-death, all-the-time cable network. Call it "Ex! Entertainment Television."
11:35 AM ::
Amy :: permalink
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