Saturday, January 28, 2006La Nausée
Tonight is the private-ish screening of the film (henceforth known as "the film," until some other film assumes the crown) I'm doing for the people who worked on it /helped with it. I should be nervous, I guess -- normally I would be -- but tonight even if I had butterflies I don't think I'd know the difference because I feel, frankly, like crap.
I do actually think I know what the problem is, and there isn't a goddamn thing I can do about it except try to be still and not let it get to me. It's not a bad-fish type thing; it's more of a my-30s-have-come-to-claim-their-due kind of thing. It isn't dangerous, just intermittently uncomfortable. Like, really uncomfortable. But I'll be fine.
Assuming, that is, I can keep a happy face on tonight. And it's a shame, because I've really been looking forward to this -- not just for whatever faint praise might come my way (insert quiet scoff here), but because there will be people there whom I want very much to see. And it sucks that I might not be feeling well enough to completely enjoy it. The good news is, I feel better now than I did this morning, and this morning I felt better than I did last night. I just don't feel, y'know, completely well. And it only take a little nausea to ruin your evening.
Oh well, fuck it. |