Wednesday, July 02, 2008
PYD #2

PYD has turned into a deeply divided group. On one side, we've got three central girls and a few accomplices, separated into two production units, who are doing good work and seeing the full benefits of the program. On the other side, we've got seven or eight boys who are dicking around and accomplishing nothing whatsoever. The real dividing line between the two is that one group is in the program because they want to be, and the other group is here because they were told to attend. They're also being paid to be in the program.

Looking at their work, it's real fucking easy to tell which group is which.

I've mostly been working with the girls -- mostly because no group of dismissive teenage boys is ever going to listen to me, but also because I suppose I'm meant to be some kind of positive role model to the girls or something like that. That makes them the second group of girls I've been a purported role model for this year -- the very idea makes me squirm.

Anyway, they're all moving on to their first round of editing today, which doesn't involve me, so I'm back to Fnorders. I'll be back with them tomorrow, and then two days next week. In happy news, I also got my first week's pay for the program -- I didn't know how much I was actually getting, so I'd scaled back my hopes to guard against disappointment. Without naming a number, though, I choked when I saw the check -- I still don't know what the total for the three weeks will be, but I can say that it'll definitely be enough for me to get a good bike, make up for the hours I missed at Fnorders, and replenish my savings. So for once, at least, an opportunity turned out solidly in my favor.

I'm also finding that I'm a lot more content when I'm at Fnorders just for having been away for half the week. Obviously the substantially higher pay constitutes a lot of that contentment, but it's not as if this work has been particularly fun or enjoyable. Mostly it's been a big pain in the ass. But just being out of that environment for a lot of the week makes it much more pleasant to return to it. I don't know if the effect would carry over if I were simply doing a second Fnorders-type job the rest of the time, but I think when this is over, it might be time to consider scaling back my Fnorders hours some and working elsewhere as well. Maybe I could find something more interesting to do twenty hours a week. Even without a pay increase, it could be a big improvement in my daily life.

First, though, there's another thing I need to take care of. The MTC film is still spinning its wheels, to the point that I'm now waking up in the middle of the night suffering from bouts of self-loathing over not having finished it yet. I keep wanting to show it to people, but it would be pointless right now -- I have lots of bits put together (the interview with Amy, who left the program early, is still one of the best interviews I've ever done -- considering how her story ends, I couldn't have asked for better material) but I still haven't gotten them all stitched together into a single film. The problem, mostly, is that I can usually only work on it for a couple of hours at a time, and those hours aren't coming when I'm at my best and most focused -- they come late at night, after a ten-hour workday. Thus, I have a piecemeal, unfocused film that looks like it was edited by someone who was really, really tired. So, sometime very soon, I think I'm going to take most of a week off from work and spend five or six days focusing exclusively on the MTC film and see if I can finally whip it into shape. It'll be a loss of a couple of hundred in income, but I believe that the PYD paychecks can help me cover the gap.

But if I can wrap up the MTC film, and get PYD behind me, and get my bike and subsequently get rid of my car, that'll be a lot of loose ends tied up. It's exactly three months until the anniversary of my arrival in Portland; it would be beautiful to have all this done by then.
1:24 PM ::
Amy :: permalink
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